Me and the Black Lives Matter Movement

Please excuse me as I stumble through this post. It's not going to be perfect or the best but I've got to put what I'm thinking down in writing, as that's how I best digest the world around me. This latest focus on the Black Lives Matter movement and the issues around being Black in our country is inspiring me to dig a little deeper and get a little uncomfortable about what I think I know and what I've been blind to. 

Racism is an evil. And in my small world, where I come in contact with such a few people, I don't spend a lot of time peering into other worlds and realities. But the more I've seen these last few weeks, the more ugly it all is. 

But what can I do about it? I'm isolated mostly in my house, I don't have many friends and I don't see my extended family very often. Am I exempt from helping? From contributing? Just because I'm a homebody. 

And what does that say about what I'm teaching my kids? What am I exemplifying?

Because that's the thing. I don't want this kind of world for my kids but how can I have constructive conversations with my girls on this topic? Why am I so uncomfortable talking about race and what can I do to help my girls be less uncomfortable so they can confront the issues they'll be left to deal with without sputtering and getting emotional when confronted.  

Click to Make Larger**

Here's what I read ... racism isn't a Black issue to fix, the oppressed can't overthrow the system that oppresses them. It's the white community that needs to change and put in work to redefine our systemic, institutional biases. The book "White Fragility" uses the comparison to sexism. Women cannot fix sexism that's inherent in our society and system. We hit glass ceilings, become "the first woman to...," and demand equal rights, but it's the men in our society who need to change -- their mindset and their actions. "Wouldn't you want the men in our society to get together and discuss sexism?" So, yup, we, as the white community, need to roll up our sleeves and join the fight for change. 

How?! For me, I need to be more informed and educated. And that will make me uncomfortable and require that I face my white privilege and see things I've been totally so blind to I'll feel like a massive idiot. Because as liberal as I think I am, I am also human and have biases -- based on my parents, where I grew up, where I live, etc. And we all have blind spots. And we're all not perfect. But the least I can do is try. 

And there seems to be things even I can do! Here's my little list: 

Be more inclusive on my Instagram feed. This sounds dumb, but follow me on this one. I delight in my Instagram time. I follow a well-curated group of DIY, aspiration ladies and companies that are in line with my style. I groom this feed weekly, adding and subtracting content that I'm newly interested in and content that is no longer interesting. But I was kinda surprised to see how white it was. I follow few minorities, at all. And not for any other reason than representation - they weren't coming up on my recommendations. And I was just blind to it. Through this BLM burst, my favorite accounts recognized and recommended a bunch of Black creators and DIYers. So I've been spending time going through these new accounts, finding content I genuinely am interested in, was similar to my style and offered inspiration and instruction. And I'm so excited for the new voices and faces I see on my feed. 

Read more Black authors and nonfiction about race. I love books but I'm pretty entrenched in my white girl main characters, usually YA, sometimes sci-fi and sometimes rom-coms. You know what I read. I've bought a few books with Black protagonists that I'm looking forward to read to open up my perspective. 

And let's not forget non-fiction! For me, reading about racism is uncomfortable. Like poking a sensitive spot. But the problem with not facing it, is we're just perpetuating it. I'm reading "White Fragility" that speaks to that discomfort and basically says GET OVER IT. Face it and move on. Because if we don't all SEE the issues clearly and continue to mindlessly ingest the spin that's being spoon-fed to us by the broken system, it will never end. (Start by listening to her GOOP podcast interview here. I also bought "Me and White Supremacy" that acts as a workshop to face biases, try to overcome them, and work to be a good ancestor to the grand-kids who will come long after me. 

I won't lie. They're both uncomfortable reads that I don't read just before bed. But I'm finding as I face my biases and name them, it's so much easier to put them down. And my ultimate goal of having an open dialog with my kids about racism continues to motivate me. 

 

Support more Black-owned business. I've always viewed shopping as a means of "voting." For example, I don't shop at Wal-Mart because they're record of treating employees, especially the women who work for them (multiple class action suits), not to mention the labor practices around the world they perpetuate (I could go on), I don't want to give that corporation any money. So I'm starting to look for Black-owned business and companies that support Black organizations to give my money to. For example, I found Semicolon, a book shop in Chicago that is owned by a Black woman. I get books, she's supported in the work she does in her community. Win-Win. 

And I'm sure I'll find more ways to help out (other than $$ donations to causes that I didn't mention) the further I get on my education. 

Ok, if you stuck through this whole post and got to the bottom, I just want to say Thank You. I'm working a lot of this out in my head as I go and it was important to me to share. I hope you take a little inspiration from my post and GO DO a few things, too. Have a conversation with your family, especially kids, about race, find a podcast or Ted Talk, or pick up a book. I believe we all have an impact on this world just by living in it and we have a responsibility to try to understand hardships and be part of the solution. "One tree, many leaves" (name the movie!)